Mixed Feelings for the New Year

Some people have been asking me lately, "How are you?" I don't really know how to respond. I'm sad and I miss Henry. I am happiest when Mack and Nathan do or say funny things or when they show me they love me. I told Nathan the other day that I love when he makes me laugh at myself. He replied, "You give me great material to work with!" We have our good days and our bad days. Time marches on at a steady pace, and sometimes I feel like it's marching on without me and I'm trying to catch back up to it. I'm having a hard time believing it's almost 2014!

It's hitting me hard this New Year's Eve that baby Henry's entire life was in 2013. We discovered his existence in February and he was born in September at 34 weeks old. 34 weeks is a huge chunk of our year! I asked my husband what the highlights of his year were. We both had a hard time coming up with non-Henry-related items. Finding out you're pregnant, getting to feel the baby kick, finding out it's another boy, coming up with a name, buying things and decorating the nursery, cleaning up all of Mack's hand-me-downs, sorting baby clothes, and going to OB appointments. All of these things were highlights of 2013.

There have also been lots of exciting Mack-related highlights of 2013. Mack became a big brother, although maybe not in the way we thought it would be. He learned how to walk, and then run, and then he never walked anywhere again! He only has one speed- fast! He has increased his vocabulary like crazy and we're starting to have legit conversations! He is using the potty (but not potty-trained all the way) and learning how to do more and more things on his own. He has finally stopped spitting up this year and his reflux has gotten much better. His little personality has blossomed and he is loving and hilarious and just a little wild :)

The mom of Mack in me can't wait for 2014 to see what else Mack will do as a two year old! The mom of Henry in me is sad to see 2013 coming to a close.

We went to the cemetery today to visit Henry's grave. I never thought I'd be spending part of New Year's Eve visiting my son's grave. I'm so glad his marker is finally here and we have a permanent place to go and remember our baby boy. I bought a bouquet of bright orange, yellow, and green flowers to put around his headstone. I thought they looked like they were cheerfully welcoming the new year.

Here is a picture of Henry's marker with the last batch of Christmas flowers that I brought.

Who knows what this next year holds for our family. The doctors say even though they have no idea what caused Henry to be stillborn, that it is less likely to happen again if we wait a full year between pregnancies. So, this year will be one of trying to be satisfied with what I have. I'm trying really hard to be completely happy being a wife and mother of a 20 month old. I'm trying not to yearn for a life where I'm a wife and mother to a 20 month old and a 2 month old. I'm trying to get used to my body again now that I'm not pregnant or breastfeeding. Now that it's actually mine again, I'm really trying to work on just being healthy for a little while. Not stick skinny, but just healthy.

I'm really excited about our church's plan to read "The Story" together this next year and study the story of God's love for us. I pray that this year includes lots of spiritual growth for our family.

Why are people with wallpaper borders less likely to get tattoos?

I was thinking about tattoos as I was removing wallpaper glue from the top of my walls in the kitchen. Tattoos and wallpaper have similar characteristics:

-They seem like a good idea at the time

-Trendy

-Pretty when you get them

-Ten years later, you start to regret them

-They no longer go with current trends or styles

-VERY HARD TO REMOVE!

That is why I feel like people who have tattoos are less likely to put up wallpaper and people who put up wallpaper are less likely to get tattoos.

We have lived in this house for 2.5 years, and for 2.5 years, I have hated the wallpaper border in the kitchen. This is the picture of our kitchen that was in the ad for our house online:

It's not horrible, but kind of dated looking. Also, the paint job was really terrible. Since I needed to repaint anyway, I figured I might as well rip off that pesky wallpaper border! My son was taking a nap one day, I saw my travel steamer, and on a whim I started ripping wallpaper off the walls! What a fun feeling!

Using my little travel steamer seemed to make it much easier to peel off the paper. There were some pesky little places where the glue was stronger, but overall wasn't bad. After sponging off the walls with hot water, we realized that the paint along the top edge of the wall had peeled. Even with a coat of primer over it, it still needed to have dry wall mud added to it to even it out. My husband added a layer of drywall mud, and then I sanded it down and washed it.

So, if you decide to take on a project like this, just know that you will make several trips around the room on a ladder/standing on countertops:
1. Removal of wallpaper
2. Washing off of glue
3. Mudding if needed
4. Sanding
5. Washing again
6. Priming with oil based primer
7. Painting the first coat
8. Painting the second coat

So, for step #6, we painted with oil based primer just over the mud and part where there used to be wallpaper glue. The paint man we talked to about this said that it can look and feel like you washed off all the glue, but you really need to use oil based primer or else the glue can start to seep through the paint.

Above: primed walls

*make sure to open some windows and turn on fans if you are using oil based primer. This stuff stinks!

Once that is dry, it's time to paint! We used Behr Hazelnut Cream from Home Depot with paint and primer in it, and it still took 2 coats. I've noticed that when I use something with more of a sheen, which I did since it's a kitchen and I wanted to be able to wipe the walls down, it takes more coats for some reason.

From drab to fab! I had no idea our walls were so "builder brown" before we painted! This color looked a little white when we first started painting, but it definitely came out true to swatch by the time we finished. When we finish painting the trim more of a true white instead of tan, I think it will look even better!

After we painted, there was one final thing to do. The builders had clearly painted and put up the wallpaper border prior to installing cabinets. I had a really hard time removing the wallpaper border above the fridge and I knew I wouldn't be able to get back in there to mud and paint. If I can't reach it, nobody can! My solution was just to move that small cabinet up to be flush with the ceiling and then I never have to worry about painting again. As a bonus, I have much more above the fridge storage! If you ever try this in your home, just be aware that cabinets weigh more than you think they will. When my husband unscrewed it, it came crashing down on the fridge. He had to rig a series of makeshift jacks with buckets stacked on top of each other to hold it up along the way! Hey, it worked!

Another project I did was taking out the canvas that no longer fit the color scheme of the kitchen and wrapping a tea towel around it and reframing it. The tea towel is about my favorite drink, sweet tea, and my friend got it for me in Savannah, GA, one of my favorite places!

I love how it turned out! Thanks Liz! 

Another problem we had in our kitchen was the french door. Light pours in from the outside right at mealtimes. I needed a window treatment that opened up and closed completely so that we can still access the outside when we need to and we can let in as much light or as little light as needed. I bought a 96" long curtain rod with wood rings from Lowe's. 

I snatched half of the curtains from the living room and put them in the kitchen. Since it's an open floor plan, it's nice that they match! 

Before, insane amounts of blinding light:

After:

These Ikea Stockholm Blad curtains open all the way past the door and actually close all the way as well. It's hard to find curtains in this size! 

The final things we did were flipping the floor plan and swapping the table. The table used to be a counter height bistro set with a tile top. Not the most practical thing in the world for a toddler needing to switch to a booster seat. 

It was such a pretty table. The things we do for love! I moved this table outside since it's actually an outdoor set and we moved the $100 table from our basement upstairs. It's probably from the 1960's with that awesome formica top and solid wood with leaves. It's very practical and wipes clean really well. My son's booster chair fits perfectly. I probably should have done it a long time ago, but I wanted to hold on to pretty things for as long as I could. 

We also moved the china cabinet to the opposite wall to be as far away from my son's seat as possible. This is also making room for the play kitchen he's getting for Christmas! 

This was the before layout with the "new" table.

The after layout. I know I already used this picture, but in case you didn't want to scroll up again.

This is the other side of the kitchen post-painting. Look- there is room for a cereal box above the fridge! 

And finally, the rolling pin. My mother-in-law gave me this awesome rolling pin. She has one just like it. She grew up on a farm in Culleoka, TN. This rolling pin and its twin that she has at her house were carved from an old tree on her old farm. I really like having a place to hang it now!

Wow, I'm tired. I know it's not everyone's dream kitchen. There is still a bunch of stuff to do like caulking the countertops and painting the trim white. But, it's a huge improvement. 

The estimate that the painters gave us on painting the kitchen and prepping the walls was $690.00! So in my book, we just saved a ton of money!